Two Words I'm Giving Up in 2018
“When we spend our lives waiting until we’re perfect or bulletproof before we walk into the arena, we ultimately sacrifice relationships and opportunities that may not be recoverable, we squander our precious time, and we turn our backs on our gifts, those unique contributions that only we can make.
Perfect and bulletproof are seductive, but they don’t exist in the human experience. We must walk into the arena, whatever it may be – a new relationship, an important meeting, our creative process, or a difficult family conversation – with courage and the willingness to engage. Rather than sitting on the sidelines and hurling judgement and advice, we must dare to show up and let ourselves be seen. This is vulnerability. This is daring greatly." - From the #1 New York Times Bestseller "Daring Greatly" by Brene Brown, Ph.D., LMSW.
This book was referred to me by one of my teammates and by page 2, I had already highlighted half the text. I typically don’t read self-help/motivational books. (Let’s be honest, I haven’t had time to read since I was pregnant, when I would tear through historical fiction one after another.)
But as I always say, you make time for what’s important to you. And what is important to me as 2017 draws to a close is to put an end to some cyclical feelings that don’t serve me in a positive way. For me that translates to two ugly words:
WORRY and FEAR.
Specifically, worry about the future and fear of the unknown.
I’m a planner. I’m extremely detailed. When I can’t predict what’s next and ensure that all will be well it feels debilitating to me. It steals my joy and my perspective. My vision becomes clouded and it is hard to see how far I’ve come and the positive productive places that I am headed toward.
Despite this, I wake up every day and grind. I do the work. I shut up, put my head down and just get shit done. I’m still a strong, confident, “extra” kind of girl. I believe my own hype. If I didn’t, who else would? But I’m straight up tired of these leaching emotions: worry and fear. Does it just come with the territory of being a lady? Cause if that’s the case, I want to sell my land.
In 2018, I want to be more carefree. To just let some things be as they are in the moment and have the patience and faith to let them unfold. Stress is bullshit. It can kick rocks.
For years, my New Year’s Resolution was to use less paper products. Like for real. I’m not joking. This is an indication of how easy my life was. I was a taken-care-of stay-at-home mom. My biggest worry was how quickly I could get through Target before one of my kids lost their shit. This makes me laugh my ass off now. How silly! I’m giving myself props for being environmentally conscience at least.
At some point we need to woman-up and confront the crap. Everyone has something about themselves that they want to change. Unless you're Beyoncé. She can stay the same.
It comes down to being fed up enough to just DO SOMETHING. To be strong by way of being vulnerable enough to acknowledge what needs fixing. To ENGAGE and EXECUTE.
I desperately want to turn off this default setting within me. And here’s the revelation:
I FREAKING CAN.
I am the operator of my internal hard drive. Some things we can’t rewire unfortunately. But in 2018, I will for damn certain do everything in my power to rewrite this code. 'Cause I’M DONE with worry and fear.
We talk about this a lot at FLF: Putting excuses to bed and diving in. Changing incrementally. Day by day. Meal by meal. Training session by training session. Until we have shifted our mindset and have found ourselves living a new lifestyle.
I already know how this process works because I practice it on the daily with my nutrition and fitness and THIS is how I will turn worry into work and fear into faith in 2018.